Random Post - News Topics 8-11

  Can't sleep so I'm writing. Apparently a french cook that had been missing for two years was found dead in his (drum roll) freezer Tuesday. Jean-Francois Poinard, 71 may he rest in peace, had been missing in his own home inside of his freezer for two years. What bothers me is that in a French city that is known for it's food the detectives in missing persons did not bother to check his house. Or maybe he died of natural causes and wanted to be put where he felt most at home...in the freezer....at home. His girlfriend who had been living with him at the time is being questioned. "Honey, can you pass the ketchup?" Sorry I'm in a morbid mood right now.

Let's see what else we got.

  Wow, the French again, y'all ain't gonna like this one. Dominique Cottrez smothered eight newborns to death after giving birth to them over a 17 year period. My thoughts are so callused on this act that all I can type is fuck you lady, there are literally millions of people that would have paid hundreds of thousands of dollars for those lives you had no right to take away. Her reason for doing this demonic devil worshiping act was that she did not want anymore children and she did not want to take contraceptives. Aww. Frowny face.
  The case came to light when a couple gardening in their backyard came across two babies bodies sealed in a fucking plastic bag. The six others were found in this sick bitches garage, but her husband says she just has psychological problems. I Say- "No, you idiot, when you kill one baby, your psychologically not sound of mind. When you kill the next seven and get away with it you like to kill living, breathing, absolutely defenseless infants because it gives you a rush making you an infanticide serial killer. Upsetting shit right people?
 The French are really dropping the ball lately.
  This is not funny, but a Groom at a wedding in Turkey fired a semi-automatic rifle in the air to celebrate his marriage which is a common tradition in Turkish matrimony. Here's the sad part, Tevfik Alitan lost control of his AK-47 and accidentally killed his own father, two aunts and several children. The only thing I can think of is, why in the fuck were there not blanks in the magazine? Even if he did shoot upward, I'll have to consult Professor Newton on this one, the bullets would eventually come down in the general location at almost ten times the velocity anyhow. HEY TURKEY: Try using firecrackers or some shit instead. My condolences to the children injured and the dead people.
  Here's another fucked up tale from Kabul, a group of humanitarian aids were executed in Badakhshan region by the T-bananas. My deepest heartfelt condolences to the families, and I know what I write is read by the Tower so I want this message to get to Odierno fellas'.

-Why in the fuck do you guys not have escorts for these selfless people? You have several regimens on standby with their goddamn dicks in their hands watching the fucking goat herders waiting to engage, no eager to engage, and you can't spare six escorts?-

 Of course the middle easterners were spared because they were reciting excerpts from the Quran, but the medical supplies and the knowledge that died with those people might have saved one of the lives of the same goat fucker that executed these beautiful people. It's ridiculous. 
  KANNABULL IS FULL.